More Stories from The Kids

Dudes, the kids are all being hilarious this week. I don't know what's going on. Maybe it's the windy fall weather in the middle of spring. Maybe it's the end of the school year. I don't know. They're all crazy people. But hilarious! Hence this blog...

S, age 7, doesn't show up to her lesson at the art center. I check the answering machine and her father has left a message. Apparently, S refused to leave the house because it was "too cold out," so she got sent to her room without dinner or piano. According to the dad, missing piano was the real punishment.

A, age 7, shows me a raccoon trap that's in their kitchen for some reason. He points at a tiny section of it, square with two holes in it. "Doesn't it look like cheese?" I stare at it for awhile. His mom whispers to me "I don't see it either, but he's been saying it all week."

J age 6 throws a pencil at my head. Oh, I'm serious. I look at him astounded and do the whole "absolutely not" speech. He gets sent to his room where he promptly falls asleep. I tell his mother about my squeamishness with having things thrown at me since, when I was 19, I got a hair pick thrown at me and it knocked out my front tooth. We all had a little laugh at that one. Later, J wakes up and comes out of his room. Mom says "Reem, J has something to say to you." J looks up at me all wide-eyed and says "Sorry you got a fake tooth, Reem."

P, age 12, is in her nightgown when I get to her house. It's 6:20 pm. She just wanted to be comfy, man!

M, age 6, points out that his neck has been growing longer. The funny thing about this one is that last week I totally noticed that his neck looked longer.

I am so glad I didn't call in sick to work yesterday or today!